Plans

I like to have plans even though they rarely work out. I think having a plan gives me a sense of control that I need however I later have to have flexibility when the plans don't work out.

I had planned on getting a second job. I applied and had an interview at a store who's logo is similar to a dart board. Got it? Well, I was told I'd get a call for a second interview but I haven't. I can't explain how that makes me feel. On one hand I am relieved because I never really wanted the job to begin with but on the other hand my ego is a bit bruised. I mean, come on....I've been turned down for a retail job? I must have come off badly in my interview.

We met with an bankruptcy attorney yesterday. It was advised that I should not have a second job at the moment as it would affect filing for bankruptcy so I suppose it was for the best.

We finally did get a call back about the fire inspection however they require our gas lines to be checked by a licensed plumber. The cheapest estimate we got for that was around $250. Have I mentioned how we don't have any money? Yeah, that kind of sucks. So, J had this great plan of taking back the tile we bought and getting our money back (around $200) to help pay for the plumber but for the life of me I can't find the receipt! I absolutely must find that receipt or it will be a very long time until we can afford the plumber which means our fire inspection won't be done which means we cannot have any children.

I miss being a mom. My heart aches to be a mom again.

J has applied for and gotten a second job. She is supposed to go in for training this week.

Depressed

Things aren't looking too rosey at the moment. We can't get a foster/adoptive placement until we get our fire inspection updated. I've sent away the application but haven't received a phone call yet. The van is having problems and costing us a bunch of money we don't have to fix it. Speaking of money....I'm so broke I can't even afford to pay attention.

It's bad here folks. It's so bad that I'm attempting to get a second job. This makes me very angry and resentful. I shouldn't have to get a second job but I guess I shouldn't have allowed things to get to this point.

However, if I had a second job, I'd have to quit if (when) we get a placement. I certainly wouldn't have the time to take care of a child and work two jobs. So, I'm looking at it as a temporary way to help pay for some of these unexpected expenses.